Jump to content

The Hugh Laurie drool pool/ appreciation thread.


  • You cannot reply to this topic
6772 replies to this topic

#6761 OneArpeggioPete

OneArpeggioPete

    darwin's shih tzu

  • Members
  • 34,596 posts

Posted 27 August 2010 - 12:38 PM

More story...

House was woken up by smells from what he presumed was the kitchen, he hadn't really taken the time to explore the house before lying down. "When's dinner?" he shouted vaguely into the direction of the backdoor. Wilson came out. "Whenever you want it. This is really for the..." "...morning?" House was suddenly wide awake. "Yes, so stay away from the kitchenette! I thought we could just get some takeaway tonight, if that's ok with you." "Fine, yeah..." House flexed his various creaky bits to check if they'd recovered enough to carry him without a pain attack: if Wilson really thought he could keep him away from what were obviously the preparations for an epic birthday breakfast he was sadly mistaken. "I'll find us something Japanese, ok?" Wilson suggested. "Ok!" Wilson went back inside, and eventually House could hear him rummaging around the front of the house, obviously on the prowl for takeaway menus. He slipped inside to the best of his abilities, following the food smells. Ah, there was the kitchenette. Meh, that looked boring, some sort of batter, some yeast... Hm... That was supposed to become an amazing breakfast? House shook his head in worry and started juggling some cutlery to help himself cogitate what these things might become. Oh, and to annoy Wilson once he'd be back in the room, there was that aspect of it. A steady rhythm helped with the juggling. And with the other aspect of it of course. "Yorn desh born, dee born desh, yeh dosh deer börk börk börk..." Happy juggling with the Swedish Chef, that tune actually had the ideal rhythm... 1-2-3-, 1-2-3... "HOUSE!" "WILSON!" "What did I tell you?" "Vhet deed i tell yuoo?" House was now on a Swedish Chef roll and had no intention of abandoning it before Wilson started to bang his head against something unyielding. "So... Are you sure you want that birthday breakfast?" "Ere-a yuoo soore-a yuoo vunt thet burthdey breekffest?" Wilson rolled his eyes. "I'm sure there's something cool on TV..." "Boot vhy vuoold I vunt tu vetch TF iff I cun stund here-a unnuyeeng yuoo insteed?" "Well if you really want to stand there and annoy me I'll be rid of you soon enough." House pulled a moue and sat down on one of the bar stools at the kitchen counter. Wilson gave up and went back to his cooking. "Well, I guess for the moment it doesn't look like anything recognisable anyway..." House found himself in total agreement with that and took to keeping himself amused by giving a running Swedish Chef style commentary on everything Wilson was doing. "Und noo ve-a poot zee yeest intu a coop ooff lookooerm veter. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp!" Eventually Wilson capitulated and started laughing. Happily that co-incided with the arrival of the miso soup and seafood tempura, so they sat down on the sofa together and checked out what the local TV-provider had to offer - which turned out to be the Muppets. House put on his spiritual and awe-inspiring one when the Swedish Chef started shooting English Muffins from the ceiling to make donuts. "Come to me, my children, and thou shalt know what the future holds in store for thee!" Wilson, however, was too busy laughing his ass off to appreciate that.

tbc

(Shit, this is beginning to read like Barney for the nominally adult. Serious time for some depression, pain and anger action really...)

:-)

oneArpeggiopete:cool:
"There should be more of that, love between people kind of randomly just because they fell for each other and stuff." - Shaneen

Posted Image



"Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is." - Stephen Fry


#6762 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 27 August 2010 - 12:54 PM

L.O.V.E.!!! :D


btw, not being in constant low isn't barney. it's luck. and they both deserve a bit.... enuff trouble ahead with the law and stuffs.

Posted Image


#6763 OneArpeggioPete

OneArpeggioPete

    darwin's shih tzu

  • Members
  • 34,596 posts

Posted 27 August 2010 - 01:00 PM

Okaaaaay... I guess as long as even happy House is still managing to be an annoying pain in the ass to his beloved it's just about fine. ;)

:-)

oneArpeggiopete:cool:
"There should be more of that, love between people kind of randomly just because they fell for each other and stuff." - Shaneen

Posted Image



"Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is." - Stephen Fry


#6764 OneArpeggioPete

OneArpeggioPete

    darwin's shih tzu

  • Members
  • 34,596 posts

Posted 04 September 2010 - 10:03 AM

W00t, the forum is back! Here's for christening with another bit of story:

House was usually the first to wake up, almost precisely six hours after going to sleep because that’s when his meds started to wear off and the pain reasserted itself with a jolly old tearing sensation. This morning, however… He opened his eyes groggily. “Wilson?” he muttered, realising the space next to him in bed was empty. He woke with a start. WTF? “Wilson?” “Coming!” “Why the hell are you up?” “Because I was going to wake you up with breakfast, duh! Why the hell are you awake?” “Because I never get more than six hours of sleep? You should have got up earlier then!” Wilson rolled his eyes. “Fine, so where do you want your extra special birthday boy breakfast now you’re up anyway?”  Oh… Of course… House smiled in expectation of something very delicious indeed. “Did you check if the hot tub they had on the Web site is actually there and working?” “It’s in the nineties out there, why on earth would you want to use the hot tub?” “You’re so right. Only my leg disagrees…” Wilson went to check on the hot tub without answering. “It’s there and it’s working”, he reported back a couple of minutes later. “Great… Let’s both get in and have birthday breakfast there. And some birthday kinky half stag sex while we’re at it.” The latter had just slipped out: Wilson was looking ridiculously hot this morning, his hair still wet from the shower, and half dressed in his boxers and a polo shirt that was slightly too small for him. He grinned mischievously: “But you already got your present yesterday.” “Oh, still recovering from the last time are we? Well I’m sure there’s a Walgreen’s somewhere in town if you need Viagra…” ‘Excuse me? You’re talking to a former porn actor!” They didn’t actually make it to the hot tub …

They were still quite busy when an acrid smell hit their noses almost simultaneously. “Oh Shit!” Wilson extracted himself, jumped out of bed and made for the kitchenette at quite impressive a speed, his self-imposed exercise programme had definitely worked. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck! I totally forgot I had already put some on!” “Some what?” “Blintzes!” Oh my god! Ok, that was a major disaster. “How many did you lose?” “Only four, there’ll still be plenty to go round.“ “PHEW! Well get cooking, wifey, I’m hungry!” Eventually he came back in. “Is the hot tub still on? Cos breakfast is ready.” “Definitely…” Blintzes, mmmmmm, and god knew what other delicious little morsels with them. House went out to the garden and found himself faced with his first challenge of the day. Ok, so the hot tub was there and it was working, but… What exactly had it said about accessibility on the Web site? The walls of this thing were about twice as high as the ones of their bathtub at home, and that wasn’t exactly a picnic to get into and out of. ARGH! He sat down on the edge and tried to swing his right leg over first, at least the hip joint on that one was fine. He lifted it and lifted it and lifted it… OW! And he wasn’t even near getting it over yet. This definitely came under cruel and usual, he decided to give the rep pf the rental company an extremely thorough talking to as soon as he was actually fed and dressed. He tried to get in left leg first from a standing position leaning on the walker like no tomorrow. No dice, that one wouldn’t lift as far either. FUCK! “Wilson! Little help?” Wilson came out and immediately recognised the problem. “You’ll need some sort of foot stool or step or something,” “Well guess what!” “Will you be ok for a couple of minutes? I’ll go down to the management office and tell them where they can stick their rent demands if they don’t at least find you a way of getting into this thing.” “Ok…” House sat down on the sun lounger to wait. Great birthday this was getting to be – NOT! It took Wilson about ten minutes to come back, in the company of a rep who was carrying a little plastic step, not unlike the ones toddlers had to reach the basin. “I am SO sorry, Dr House, that should never have happened.” “No it shouldn’t have.” “I know. See, these things get stolen an awful lot, so we never seem to have one for every property we’re managing here. Turns out there was a typo on the maintenance form and this one was put into number 17 instead of yours here.” “You realise this is all pretty pathetic, right? Why don’t you just put in proper accessible tubs everywhere? God knows you’re charging enough to pay for it!” “Hm yes, in an ideal world I’d agree with you, but…” “Ideal world my ass! Do you have any idea about the amount of pain I’m in now because your bosses are too fucking stingy to invest another 150 bucks per property? That’s all it would cost!” The rep actually looked concerned now. “Well, I can only repeat my apology in the name of the company and assure you that it comes from the heart. Anything I can do for you to make your sojourn as comfortable as possible, just let me know.“ Prescription narcotics would have been a nice idea… House beat that thought down before it could develop into a craving. “Ok, is there anything more in this place an old cripple should know about except for the steps outside and this absurdly maldesigned hot tub?” “Um… Not that I’m aware of. Would you like me to pass on your suggestion about the hot tubs to management?” “Yes…” “Ok… Look, here’s an idea. Don’t bother going down to the office if you find there’s anything else not to your liking. My name is Jeremy, and here’s my card with my mobile number. If there’s anything you need, just give me a call!” He seemed genuine, so House spared him the Brit jokes that had been rearing to go in the back of his mind. “Ok, and now let me try this thing before you run away. That was obviously made for a dwarf with unusually small feet.” He tried it. It just about worked. “Thanks”, Wilson said and brought the rep to the door, while House was finally getting comfortable and letting the hot water work on the tense, cramping flesh in his thigh.

Eventually Wilson came with the breakfast tray. “The blintzes are cold now, sorry. But I guess the rest is still nice.” House looked it over. Blintzes, sour cream, caviar, lox… Oh god that looked amazing. He smiled. “Come in, I’m sure it’s still good.” Wilson came in and they finally went back to the actual business of the day. “Mazel tov, House, here’s to another year!” They clinked their coffee cups. “If that… I won’t start looking as far ahead before that check-up in three months.” Wilson looked annoyed. “Do you have to put a damp cloth on everything?” “Just being realistic. Anyway, it’s all good, we’ve already had a lot longer than I ever thought we would.” “True… There were times when I thought you wouldn’t make it to 63.” “There were times when I thought I wouldn’t make it to 53.”  House stretched out languorously, at least this tub was nice and roomy and the hot water was finally beginning to do its job. He shovelled another blintz into his mouth, loaded with seafood and sour cream. “I’ll just go on taking it a day at a time, seems like it works.” “Ok…” “Where did you get all the seafood from? I can’t remember you shopping…” “I called the management company on the way and asked them to put some into the fridge.” Wow, that had been innocent thinking. “And you honestly expected it to stay there?” Wilson grinned. “Every fridge has a secret compartment. Well, secret from you anyway.” “Right, I’ll remember to check the veg drawer the next time.” “Damn!” But Wilson snuggled himself into the crook of House’s neck anyway. This was good…

tbc

:-)

oneArpeggiopete B)
"There should be more of that, love between people kind of randomly just because they fell for each other and stuff." - Shaneen

Posted Image



"Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is." - Stephen Fry


#6765 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 22 September 2010 - 04:01 PM

:) :) LOVE it :)

Posted Image


#6766 wendellg

wendellg

    Silver, blue, and gold

  • Members
  • 4,489 posts

Posted 22 September 2010 - 04:49 PM

Well dang, how did I miss this update? Glad I just found it :)

Come Monday, it'll be all right...

You gotta walk that lonesome valley, you gotta walk it by yourself. Ain't nobody here can walk it with you, you gotta walk that lonesome valley by yourself.


#6767 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 23 September 2010 - 01:06 PM

I'm sorry but I am not fine with the new murmurs. I like the design, but..... it's so complicated to find threads one posted in. :(

Posted Image


#6768 OneArpeggioPete

OneArpeggioPete

    darwin's shih tzu

  • Members
  • 34,596 posts

Posted 25 September 2010 - 03:10 PM

More story...

House's cell rang while he was still pulling on his socks. He groaned - why the hell, after all these years, hadn't people still copped on to the idea that he didn't like birthday calls? But then at least that person had had the decency to wait till he could reasonably expected to be awake and breakfasted. He took the call with a sigh. "Yeah..." "Happy birthyday to youuu... happy birthday to youuuu..." Anyone but Gina would have immediately found themselves bereft of his friendship for that. "Hi poop machine, are you getting me something nice then?" "But you're in Maine, so I can't get you anything!" Gina sounded sulky. "Well you could give to me when we get back, or the next time you come round..." "Okaaaayyyy... So what do you want?" "A cool bumper sticker would be nice." "But you've already stuck Jews do it for eight Nights on your new car and Grampa was annoyed with you." "Well by now he quite likes it. Anyway, not the Volvo, silly! Your wonderful, sweet, amazing Grampa got me a vintage Dodge Viper for my birthday and that definitely needs a cool bumper sticker." "A what?" "It's a really hot sports car. And it's orange. You'll love it." "Woooooowwwww... Can I see it?" "Later, ok? It's parked outside." "Ok... Oh... Uncle Greg!" She sounded quite excited now. "Yeah..." "I got four Excellents in my report card!" "Wow, well done! In what?" He remembered his own first report card, and how excited he had been about the four A's... Till his dad had got to see it, and had never got beyond acknowledging the one D. "In numeracy, and spelling, and word... com... compre..." "Comprehension?" "Yes... What does that mean?" House found it impossible not to snort at the irony of that. "What?" "It means you're good at understanding what a word means." Gina giggled. "Oh..." "So what's the fourth Excellent in?" "Music!" "Yay!" "Yes, and Ms Hillstrom said I'm really good and should audition for the choir!" Wow, that was great. House was sharing Gina's excitement now, he felt proud that he had managed to pass on that passion to her. Suddenly she sounded slightly more downcast: "I got one Needs Improvement, though." "Aw, what in?" "Gym class... I hate it!" She sounded honestly pissed off. "But you love running around and swimming and playing ball and stuff, so what's that all about?" "Yeah, but... in gym class we all have to run a certain way, and then we have to throw a ball against the wall ten times, and then we have to play Dodgeball and Billy Codswaller always tries to hit me and then we have to climb the ropes... It's stupid!" House could totally see her point. He had only begun to shine in gym class long after elementary school himself, when his natural athletic talent had almost automatically granted him places and rapid promotion on the competition teams. "It'll get more fun when you're in high school, promise." "And in the mean time?" "Hit Billy Codswaller really hard a couple of times, that'll teach him." "But he's huge!" "Is there any other girl you know he's mean to?" "Yes... Meera... And Rosie. She's new. But she's really nice. Ms Hillstrom said she wants me and Meera to be her friends." "Well then it's three of you against one of him, isn't it? So you can all hit him really hard the next time you play Dodgeball." "Ok..." She sounded a bit more enthusiastic again now. "Oh and last week the photographer came and we all had to have our pictures taken, and there was a big group picture, and then there was an open day for all the kids who start school next term and we sold cake and..." "Wow, sounds like you had an exciting last week in school. May I finish putting on my socks now?" "Okaaaaaay... Did Grampa bake you a cake with candles?" "No, but he made me blintzes and lox and caviar for breakfast." "EEEEEEEEW, that's disgusting!" "What is?" "Caviar! Fish eggs! EW!" "Great, more for me. And now I have to get my crippled ass to the boardwalk and give your grampa panic attacks on the bumper cars. I'll call you and show you the new car when we get out of the house, promise." "Right, see you!" "See you!" He finished the call and found that in the meantime he had missed three more, Cuddy, Foreman and... a German number? Huh? +49258... What? Before he could start thinking about it the phone rang again. "HappybirthdayGregSogoodtotalktoyouHaven'thadadrinkwithyouforeverReallygottameetupwhenIgetoutThere'snoreasonwhy- Ishouldbeinhereanyway..." "Hi Alvie, are you off your meds again?" The conversation went on in this style for about twenty minutes, during which it transpired that yes, indeed Alvie had taken himself off his meds again, and indeed he was inside again, and as far as House was personally concerned, for very good reason. He didn't even try to tell him what had happened in his life recently, there was no point. Instead he just promised to come and see him after the vacation, and finished the call rolling his eyes at Wilson. He then finished getting dressed. "Oh, we gotta get Gina something nice, she got four Excellents in her report card." "Cool! Why don't we take her shopping the next time she stays over, she can pick out something then." "Ok... Any idea who could try to call me from Germany?" Wilson shrugged. "Not really..." But there was a look in his eyes that said he knew more than he was letting on. "Wilson..." "Honestly! And I'm sure if it was important they'll try again anyway." House dropped the subject for the time being but couldn't really stop thinking about it. They went out and House messaged a picture of the Viper to Gina, feeling not quite up to another phone conversation yet. He had psyched himself up for age-inappropriate adventure and being congratulated on being the age he actually was sort of interfered with the fun of that.

Wilson gave him a smile as they stepped out on to sidewalk and lightly chuckled at his T-shirt, a beautiful black number featuring Clint Eastwood and the words STILL MORE BADASS THAN YOU in capital letters. "So where to now?" "Boardwalk, I want to go play!" Wilson didn't seem overly enthused about that, but then that was the nice thing about birthdays, he got to do exactly what he wanted. "Right, boardwalk it is..." "God, the enthusiasm. Smile and I'll buy you some cotton candy!" Wilson smiled weakly. "As long as you don't expect me to go on the scary rides with you..." "Aaaaaaaaaw... I promise I'll hold you tight." "You'd be better off promising to wash my shitty pants afterwards." The house wasn't quite at the sea front, so the boardwalk was about half a mile away. "Are you sure you don't wanna drive it?" "Yeah, my leg is fine now. And there are benches everywhere, it'll be ok." All in all, with lots of sitting down inbetween, it took them about 20 minutes to actually get there, and then House did buy his beloved the promised cotton candy. "White or pink?" "I don't even want to know what would happen if I said pink." "Haahaa, you said pink!" Wilson rolled his eyes. "Just ignore him", he said to the guy at the stall. "Make it white." "Comin' right up, sir!" He looked House up and down. "Love your T-shirt!" House grunted something that he hoped didn't sound too much like "thanks" and paid for the candy. Wilson was looking happier again now, obviously getting into the swing of things. "Greg?" "Hm?" "Love you!" "Love you, too, Jimmy. And we won't go on any of the scary rides, I've seen enough of you scared shitless recently. Mind you, that's MY definition of scary rides, not yours. Bumper cars are officially not scary." Wilson laughed. "Ok." This birthday was getting to be good after all.

tbc

(still Barney with a limp, I know, but then I guess on holidays that's allowed...  ;) )

:-)

oneArpeggiopete B)
"There should be more of that, love between people kind of randomly just because they fell for each other and stuff." - Shaneen

Posted Image



"Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is." - Stephen Fry


#6769 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 25 September 2010 - 03:36 PM

okay, I didn't call anyone, I love the name codswaller and I LOVE pink cotton candy. only the blue stuff is better cause it gives ewe blue tongue. and I seriously enjoy the two wrinklies having a goooood time :D :D *still wants some cotton candy. with sparkly bits*

Posted Image


#6770 wendellg

wendellg

    Silver, blue, and gold

  • Members
  • 4,489 posts

Posted 25 September 2010 - 04:08 PM

Nice :) And now I too want cotton candy! A mix of pink and blue.

Come Monday, it'll be all right...

You gotta walk that lonesome valley, you gotta walk it by yourself. Ain't nobody here can walk it with you, you gotta walk that lonesome valley by yourself.


#6771 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 26 September 2010 - 03:48 PM

hmmmm... now why does that remind me of our two?
Posted Image

Posted Image


#6772 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 27 September 2010 - 04:48 PM

Old Fart T-Shirt, I guess...
Posted Image

Posted Image


#6773 GreenSpirulina

GreenSpirulina

    Rock Kitteh

  • Members
  • 11,851 posts

Posted 02 December 2010 - 03:09 PM

"Cheerios, Frosted Flakes, and Alphabits" is an example of a cereal comma.

Posted Image






0 user(s) are reading this topic

members, guests, anonymous users